Postpartum

Right after delivery and as I was almost finished with my stitches, the nurses brought Caleb over to me and let him lay on my chest, skin to skin. I was told that this is very important. I was surprised at how heavy he seemed to me. Maybe it was because I was so wore out from the whole ordeal. A lactation consultant was there and helped him hook up to my breast for his first feeding. There were very few problems. He latched on and started to eat. However, in the days and weeks following, his "thrust reflex" (the tongue going in and out of his mouth) got in the way and we couldn't get the poor child to latch for anything. Consultants tried everything--dropping a little sugar water on the breast to attract him to it, squirting formula in his mouth while he's close to the breast so he makes the association that breast=food. Nothing seemed to help. I also think my colostrum wasn't fully in until a couple of days after delivery. I'm sure that was part of his frustration as well.

One thing I quickly learned in the few weeks following Caleb's birth is that it IS possible to be given too much advice. While I'm sure the lactation consultants meant well, their advice really turned out to be more of a headache in the long run. The nurses gave me the option of taking care of Caleb in the nursery while I attempted to get some sleep at night. They brought him in two to three times each night for his feeding and basically left me there to figure it out. They said to call if I needed help but they didn't really know how to help anyway. So I was left there in a state of sleepiness with a crying and hungry baby to try and get him to latch and eat. Sometimes it was sucessful, sometimes not. The doctor was worried about the amount of a certain substance in Caleb's blood, called biliruben, which somehow prevents him from being jaundiced. They made a big deal about this because if he didn't eat enough then he would have a low biliruben level. This was worry number one for a scared and confused first time mom. They also told me he needed to eat every two hours and that if he was asleep I should wake him up. They reccomended cruel things like taking off his clothes, slapping his back, etc. These methods basically made him nice and mad and do you think he would settle down for food after that? Not a chance! Advice to any mommies-to-be out there: do NOT wake your baby up to feed him, especially at night. I promise, he will be okay.

We also got a breast pump from our sister-in-law. I had it with me in the hospital and tried pumping a little bit so we could feed Caleb using a bottle. Another word of advice to new moms: don't introduce the bottle to your little one until he's at least a month old. Caleb became a victim of "nipple confusion". Formula bottles have a faster flow than the breast. They don't require latching, and they're generally a lot easier to get food from. If the kid can get easy food from a bottle, do you think he's going to make the effort to get food from the breast? Not a chance! So we were up for a good four hour screaming match late one night after we got smart and decided we were going to cut the bottle completely. It was trying, but worth it. Now he's a breast feeding pro.

We didn't get smart about the words of advice we were going to follow until we talked to our sister-in-law. She has five kids, so her advice came from experience. It's not to say that doctors and lactation consultants don't have kids and/or experience, but sometimes I think they have an agenda. They stick to what "the books" tell them is the right thing to do, and really have a hard time catering to the needs of the individual child. I truly believe that only the parents know best and even as a first time mom fluttering to figure out how to tend to the needs of my new little bundle, I could have done better with just the words of my sis-in-law and left the doctors and consultants to their own.

Breast feeding was probably the biggest challenge I had postpartum, but there were a few other challenges as well. The first time I went to the bathroom in the hospital, the nurses came in to help. When I got up I became very light headed. So much blood is lost during the whole birth process that this seems to be a typical reaciton. It was kind of scary--I almost passed out. My face stayed a whitish color for a good couple of days. Also I had the shivers for about a week. I'd complain of being cold and Greg would say "but it's not cold in here". At least he'll know next time that I'm not being strange. And of course there's the general uneasiness of being a new mom, and trying to figure out how to care for my little one, etc. Plus I was incredibly emotional, and didn't have energy to do much even though I wanted to do everything. The ibuprofin helped for my vaginal pain (from the stitches), and thankfully I didn't have to take that for very long. The postpartum bleeding was annoying but only lasted about 7 weeks so I can't complain too much. And I haven't had a period since, also a plus side to breast feeding. :-)

So now Caleb is 16 weeks old and he brings so much joy to my life. I can't wait to begin writing in "real time" and share his many adventures with you. :-)